"The label you give yourself cannot impact external forces that are not motivated by your own psychology or influenced by a third party's pre-existing consciousness of you. We are all presented with reasons to struggle which come from completely external forces; to pretend that one is not struggling is either arrogance or an admission of defeat. To admit that one is struggling is a sign and a source of strength." - Evan A. Baker

Friday, April 24, 2009

Oooh! An Audition!

So okay! After feeling a bit depressed, and then being told to stick with it and I'm awesome, by my very own awesome friends, it's time to bounce back: An audition that I was trying to get (Submitted on actors access, emailed a submission to personal emails (I know and worked with them before, so I figured it was okay) and then went to the production company's website and submitted there again. Obsessive? Yeah, okay, I'll take that. But it's a project that is being produced by Dave K! Yes, Carter, That Dave K, from Tango! (CarterArtist, Dave K, Glow, P-Winkle and I all worked together at a tapas restaurant that is sadly, no more. but oh, their sangria and cajun chicken eggrolls...) came through! I got an audition slot!

At any rate, the first time I worked with Dave K with his production company, they were just beginning. And it was a fantastic audition with a ton of backstory that I will get into probably Sunday, once the audition is over and I've had time to dissect every little bit of it. But it's a fun story, good for ego.

Nah, you know what? To hell with it, I'll get into it now:

It was for a short film, and Dave K asked if I wanted to audition for his project he was producing. Hells yah! I had to have a monologue prepared, and as every actor who graduates theatre school knows, you are supposed to have at least 3 monologues in your back pocket ready to go. So I already had one. Yay me.

I get to the audition place (I believe this was waaaay back in 05, btw) and Dave K introduced me to his friend TJ. They asked me if I was ready to go, I said, sure, and away I went.

Cricket.

No, seriously, I think a cricket had walked in there. Then they both said, that was amazing. TJ asked who my agent was. "What's that?" I might've replied at the time. Apparently, I floored them both, and TJ said, bless his heart, and it's a reason I will always love him, "How can someone as talented as you not have an agent?" Sigh.

He gave me his cell phone number on the spot saying he wanted to help me. And he was the type of person who you know puppies and kittens follow around cuddling up to. He was so nice, so sincere.

Dave K and TJ told me that they were so excited to tell the director about me, that I was called back, and yadda yadda yadda.

At the call back, I decided to do something different! And it was at that callback I learned that was the dumbest thing I could have ever done. After I was done, and when I got a phone call, where they guys told me they were sorry, I wasn't picked for the lead in the short. That "the director didn't see what we do." I was asked if I wanted to be an extra for the film. Aw, heck, why not. So I did that.

And I called up TJ, hoping to learn as much as I could about how the biz worked, willing to memorize anything he'd tell me. But unfortunately we kept playing phone tag. He had just booked a pilot and was crazy busy. But, he said, I really want to do this for you, so don't give up on me just yet. I waited another month or two, called him again seeing if he was available, but his pilot got picked up and was going to series. I thought to myself, well, that's probably the end of that.

A couple of years later, an episode of his show was being screened at the Academy of Television with a cast q&a. I went. TJ was the only cast member to stay out in the lobby and meet with each and every person (around what, 200?) who wanted to say hello to him. I waited, and waited, and finally, I had my turn! "Hey TJ," I said, "I don't know if you remember me, but--"
"How could I forget you, Elle?"

He remembered me! He remembered me! I felt runway fashion model tall! A lead on a tv series who thought I had a great audition remembered who I am! From YEARS ago!!

It was only small talk, how much I enjoyed the show, how happy I was for him, how, if he ever checked his imdb comments, it's all filled with people singing his praises about what a great guy he is. Cause he IS!

A year or two later, I received a party invite from him. I thought, oh, he must've mass emailed everyone on his list, but I went anyway. There was Dave K, and it was so fun to catch up with him. I still hadn't seen TJ yet, but he knew how to throw a party. Then, I saw him. Again, he was saying hello to everyone who was there, only paying attention to that person. Which, to me, is such a movie star quality. To make someone feel as if they're the only person in the room.
Finally, he approaches me, with a hug, "I'm so glad you could make it, Elle!"

They say the most beautiful word in any language is a person's own name. So if you say their name to them, it's almost like a compliment. And it is, to have someone remember my name. I mean, I'm nobody. I'm a struggling actress. And yet he remembered my name.

TJ and Dave K are both producing the film I am auditioning for. I'm reading for Grace, female, early-mid 20s, spunky, playful, tough; Ellen Page/Rachel McAdams-types. Must be friendly with animals, dogs, cats, etc...LEAD

The script is beautiful and absolutely charming. I need to prepare 2 of the 3 scenes from the sides, and if they have time, they might see my second scene. So I'm super excited.

Wish me luck. Not only would working with friends be so great, but the film itself is going to be just beautiful. Fingers crossed, people! Fingers crossed! Being opposite TJ in a feature as his love interest would definitely boost my career. But I also know how these things work: If Ellen Page or Rachel McAdams said, hey, can I be Grace? She would. Oh, but whatever. Fingers crossed!

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