"The label you give yourself cannot impact external forces that are not motivated by your own psychology or influenced by a third party's pre-existing consciousness of you. We are all presented with reasons to struggle which come from completely external forces; to pretend that one is not struggling is either arrogance or an admission of defeat. To admit that one is struggling is a sign and a source of strength." - Evan A. Baker

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Fine Tuning

I dare say that my short script idea is a pretty good one, and that my husband's notes and comments are brilliant. When we had another couple over for dinner the other night, I told them the very basics of the story, and a few scenes I thought were key in telling the story.

"It doesn't sound like a short," Carrie said. "No, this is definitely a feature." her husband Jake agreed.

NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

I don't want to write a feature script! That is 90 effing pages and, and, like, months of writing and rewrites! That's too much time, too much work in a medium I never took a class in how to write!

And then my stupid brain, just an hour ago, whispered, "You know what, maybe this is your first novel."

NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

And the whole thing is just so very, very strange because if this little thing was a book, I could easily write it right now. I know these characters, I know their story, and it's weird, because, well....

I write monologues. I'm used to it. It's a story that is taking place RIGHT NOW in a character's life, at a heightened moment or crisis in their life, where, similar to an essay, the ending ties back to the beginning.

I had written a small monologue that was kind of the jumping off point to this idea about, geez, over a year ago. It was just the RIGHT NOW of a wife's tremendous guilt. And after five minutes of writing, and probably even less than that, the monologue was done. I'm used to writing small things, small blips, that's it! It's done! I've no patience for things that take more than days to write.

But I think maybe I wouldn't mind spending so much time, a year, longer, who knows, with these characters, with this story.

But I keep telling myself, calm down. Finish fine tuning the short, send it to your friends, get their opinions after reading what you have and go from there. From there. Focus, focus, focus.

Fine tune for another few days and go from there. Because if I can just focus on the now, just focus on the small parts, maybe one day, a year from now, I'll have a novel. If I just shut up and focus on the now, and the small parts, maybe all that work and time won't seem like work and time. It'll be fun.

But who knows. Maybe I'm hugely overstepping myself and the whole thing is crap.

I told you I have terrible self doubt! ;)

7 comments:

  1. Go for it! If you need an objective editorial eye, please don't hesitate to contact me. I've helped other new authors get their ideas into print. Being an actress, a storyteller, and a writer/editor, I think I would bring a solid perspective.

    Lisa Carlson
    www.editorsforum.orgdisplay_info.php?mid=23

    ReplyDelete
  2. Listen to that voice! There's nothing cooler than writing a novel.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Check out David Trottier's Screen Writers Bible. It's very step-by-step and really engaging. Helped me a lot when I started with my feature script. Come to think of it, I should probably go back to this book, since I am stuck at around 60 pages. But I digress. Another awesome book is Save the Cat by Blake Snyder. Both of these book are well checking out and may help you overcome your feature-script fear. xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I was actually given the Screenwriter's Bible by the very friend I sent out my rough draft to! He thought I would like it and I did! It's still right here, to my left, and I've been meaning to read it.

      I know the cover of Save the Cat! I've seen it many times!

      Great recommendations.....I should start reading now!

      Delete
  4. Wow, I totally relate to this. I just finished my second feature length screenplay. It was an idea I carried around for almost a year. Finally, I decided I couldn't ignore it anymore.

    For any writer, it is really hard to be objective when you are so intimately involved in your own creative process. Despite this, I really worked hard to FINISH my script. I did final edits(realizing that if anything else did "happen" with my script -- like it actually being made into a movie -- that there would most likely be more work needed), registered it with the WGA, and sent it off to a screenwriting competition. Hey, it can't hurt. At the very least, I feel great that I finished out a concept that I felt was worth exploring.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think I always forget - the human experience is ALWAYS worth exploring, as that is what binds us together.

      Good luck with your script's competition! :)

      Delete
  5. The talented Nora Ephron has just passed away - I recommend to you, in her honor, that you read all of her books and screen plays. My favorite is her novel "Heartburn." I think your writing style is like hers - you both use lots of honesty.
    Aunt Sira

    ReplyDelete

Play nice.