"The label you give yourself cannot impact external forces that are not motivated by your own psychology or influenced by a third party's pre-existing consciousness of you. We are all presented with reasons to struggle which come from completely external forces; to pretend that one is not struggling is either arrogance or an admission of defeat. To admit that one is struggling is a sign and a source of strength." - Evan A. Baker

Friday, November 11, 2011

Perfect November Skies

Thank you all for your good thoughts and for those of you who reached out to me via email in regards to my mother. She is back at her care facility, feeling better. Trying to figure out how to prevent further infections will be a challenge, as she won't go to a dentist until she is in so much pain she'll agree to go to the hospital. For some reason, she can't seem to remember the old Mom adage, an ounce of prevention...

I feel like I'm fighting something that might not really be there. Like I'm a hypochondriac battling an infection. That's what life has been feeling like. Unsure, unbalanced, tripping along, hoping I'll be able to straighten my feet out so I can walk again. No more uphill, no more San Francisco streets, just even, Valley, perfectly flat gridded streets.

If only it was that easy, right?

Maybe I'm on a precipice of something major, something huge, and like a dog before an earthquake, I'm uneasy, whimpering.

I prefer the overcast gray skies; fitting my moods. Perfect November mornings.

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