"The label you give yourself cannot impact external forces that are not motivated by your own psychology or influenced by a third party's pre-existing consciousness of you. We are all presented with reasons to struggle which come from completely external forces; to pretend that one is not struggling is either arrogance or an admission of defeat. To admit that one is struggling is a sign and a source of strength." - Evan A. Baker

Thursday, March 10, 2011

Taking the Vacation

A lot of times, a Struggling Actress will take a look at future events and sigh, "That's during pilot season." "That thing's during episodic time." "I can't go to that, because I can't be away for two weeks or my agents will kill me!"

You know what you have to say to that?

Bull Pucky.

Take. The. Vacation.

Take the time off to see your friend get married. Take the time off for some badly needed recharging. Take the time off to maintain a level of sanity for the craziness that is your life for the rest of the year.

I'm on vacation, meeting my new niece during what my agents and managers call the busiest time for their clients at my level - THIS, they say, is the beginning of pilot season for people who are not movie stars, who are not tv stars. THIS is the time they can push their new clients and get them seen.

This is the time I'm taking off to feed, burp, and change diapers. This is the time I'm taking off to rock a baby I will know for the rest of my life to sleep. This is the time I'm taking off from auditions, from callbacks, from pilots, so that I can stare into the blue eyes of the  most beautiful baby girl and watch her yawn and slowly drift away to dreamland in my arms, against my chest, nuzzled in my neck.

You might be struggling, but you can't keep passing on life events so that you'll always be available to a possible job opportunity that might actually never materialize. You need these events to help you make acting choices- to remember how you feel now so that you can use it for another character- because now you know what it's like to go to get engaged, to go to a wedding, to hold a baby.

And if you have reps like mine who say, "That's an important thing that only happens a few times a lifetime. Go, go be with your family. It's more important than anything else," hold onto them. Because they get it. They get the struggle. They get what it's like to be an actor.

And they believe in you enough to get the next audition when you come back.

And if you have reps who ask "would you fly back for this commercial in the middle of your trip because it pays $2,400?" it is perfectly okay to say, No, I wouldn't. Because time with family is worth so, so, so much more than that.

And always will be.


  1. That is a wonderful attitude -- this is not a dress rehearsal, people; this is LIFE! You have to take the opportunities as they come -- not wait for future events that might not happen!

    And also, Lira, I would like to say, not to be a creepster, but you are awesome and I think we should hang out some time! Perhaps go see an improv show and/or have some coffee?

  2. You are too right. And I think more people need to hear this. For the longest time my attitude towards upcoming events that would take me away from the city was.."we'll see." Because as you know it's a constant game of "who knows what i might have going on?"

    I'm a firm believer (now) that it will all work out. Those jobs will always be there. for me? There will always be another Hamlet, or Comedy or Errors. There will only be one first anniversary, or post-poned Christmas, or..just need to get away.

    Take care of yourself first.

    Soo good to catch up with all your writings. Thank you


Play nice.